I should be asleep but my mind is buzzing with the days thoughts and it lead me to thinking about my job and more specifically something I shared with a colleague today.
I mentioned that the last 8 months have been a whirlwind and sometimes I have questioned whether I should be working for a cancer charity. A place that reminds me of my illness every day. But mostly I love working there. If I’d not had cancer I would never have known I had such a passion and raw determination to help and support others.
It’s not been easy. When I started there I had barely finished chemo and rads. I was exhausted. I didn’t have very much hair. Looking back now I have no idea how I managed to hold a job down and commute.
8 months later and a lot more energy and hair 😆 I’m constantly pushing forward, striving for better for myself and people affected by cancer.
My colleagues are a part of my cancer journey. They’ve come along for the ride, and I guess I feel a special bond with them, maybe because they’ve supported me when I’ve needed it and basically I’ve been recovering all the while I’ve been at work.
In a way I am child like, Cancer has made me regress emotionally and I am sometimes all over the place. Nobody wants to cry or act like a t@at at work but I’ve accepted that this is a journey, my journey, and people are more understanding than maybe I used to give them credit for.